It’s been several weeks since I’ve shared my thoughts. Where have I been? Wallowing… I have been trying to dig myself out of the abyss…the inky, dark hole where some people venture after losing long-term jobs. I have been feeling like a failure…I let myself and my family down when I lost my job. There is a hitch – I’m not a failure! I had become comfortable and complacent. I truly believed I would remain with my last position until I retired! This was a pipe dream! With the exception of one individual within my “geographical” department, I liked my co-workers and considered them friends. Two were special and became my office “husband” and “brother.” I miss these guys BUT I don’t miss the employer! My position was just that – a job. It was not a career. When my position was “eliminated,” I gave the former employer “permission” to knock me down…make me feel unwanted…not needed. In my mind, this job was the end-all and be-all. Not true… I know I would be a great benefit to any organization – I just need to believe it with my whole heart and being. I need to reprogram my mind to acknowledge this part of my employment voyage has ended and another one is around the corner! I am still SEETHING with anger at the former employer – this corporation that is so narrow-minded and primarily youth-oriented. Numbers are the key figure; however, it is patrician-heavy and plebeian-shy. I’ll land on my feet again – I have a good support system and I just need to start believing in myself again!